In which I sleep my way to next week...

Hi, I'm Natalie, and I can't stay awake after 12 noon.

But I can't go to sleep until 2am so I guess I'm even on the sleep stakes in some twisted universe somewhere.


I used to be all over sleep deprivation.


The baby years were a breeze. I just slept when she slept and used my total lack of social tendencies to deter visitors so I didn't have to do the housework.

And I've been stressed for a long time. There is not really any difference in the level of stress because as more piles on, I stop giving a shit about what I was stressed about before so I can't say I'm any more overwhelmed than normal*


*Normal being described as about four feet under the level of the metaphorical water at any given time...

I've forgotten some quite important stuff over the last few days. Like Friday, when I had an appointment to finish some paperwork at my new job. And which I remembered yesterday afternoon about 6 minutes after they shut.

Oh smeg.

In my defence Frog and I came down with a nasty cold Thursday night. WonderMan was out doing a nighttime driving stint so it was no sleep for over anxious, breathing deprived me. 

But I feel SO DAMN STUPID.


It was even written down in my pretty Kikki K diary from my secret santa, in which I write everything and which has never let me down so far this year. And to be fair, I let it down by forgetting what day it was, which way my head was supposed to go on, and how to speak real words.

The hangover from the cold is sticking around so people in my new community will think I am a flame cheeked, glassy eyed, sloth type creature with a voice like a chain smoking old woman with tissues stuck up her nose.

Way to go with making an impression. At least they will remember me. Because I'm quite sure I will not remember them.


I'm quite smegged off about this cold actually, because apart from the brain melting, memory erasing symptoms exhibited... I was actually invited out for coffee, by a real person, which is like telling me I've won tickets to Disneyland... and I had to say no, because I would never forgive myself if I gave her or her darling baby my germs. I detest people who bring their sniffly, coughing, runny children to my house to ruin our immune systems willy nilly and was not going to do that to someone I've just met.


Rats.


So anyway, I'm off to tint an industrial jar of gap filler, so I can trowel it on under my eyes and fake it til I make it.