Wednesday, 7 September 2011

It's not okay, OKAY??

Yesterday, I was pretty okay with things. In fact, I had more than enough for my Hey, It's Okay Tuesday post.

Today, I am not so okay.

By 8am I counted 14 things I was not okay about, and this simply between my bedroom, and the kettle.

It's lunchtime now, and if I tried to tell you all the things I was not okay about I would still be talking next Tuesday, when I would have to pause while I listed the two things I AM okay about for another HIOT post.

One is that Frog slept in, so we were past the dreaded brekky time and I did not hear ANY shouting for a whole half hour.

The other is that I have a fancy new car, and people I don't like keep waving to me as I go past, which means I can snob them in triumph.

Yes, I know, pretty petty things to be okay about, but it's all I've got, m'kay?

To give you an idea of the scale of my non okayness, here are some random things that have made me want to pull my eyeballs out in misery so far:

WonderMan can't put his underwear and socks in the washing basket, despite putting the REST OF HIS CLOTHES IN THERE. He also cannot fold his pyjamas. Seriously. Just fold them. I will set them on fire with him in them if he leaves them on the floor again.

Tiger's room had stuff everywehere on the floor, which I tripped over, despite me making her clean it up morning and night for the last few days. I may have enlisted the help of a garbage bag or two to get my point across.

My favourite jeans were on the line. Because IT RAINED YESTERDAY instead of being sunny as I REQUIRED. This is totally unacceptable.

I had to go outside to get them and put them in the dryer. This made me huffy, and I stubbed my toe on the door, because Karma stalks my grumpy arse.

I have to do a menu plan and the shopping today. Which takes up like, forever, and gets in the way of me doing important jobs like painting my nails.

I have to paint my nails again today because my very expensive quick dry polish dried like soft putty and smudged when I glanced in it's direction.

I couldn't find my hairbrush and had to use Frog's. Which works better.

Both my kids bedhair looks better than mine after I have struggled with it all morning.

My skin is flaky and dry. Applying moisturiser made the flaky bits MORE OBVIOUS. And then I found a pimple.

I have a lot of housework to do because I have been a Champion Procrastinator all week.

WonderMan just told me his friend is coming to visit this afternoon. I have less than four hours to clean the house, do the shopping, bake afternoon tea, and look like a domestic goddess.

I actually helped The Bitch, and was not at all patronising or smarmy about it, and she immediately decided to call me a "gutter-slut" on Facebook. BECAUSE I HELPED. Seriously. FY.

I could make topiary statues out of the thistles in my front garden.

My back hurts.

I'm tired.

It's not Friday yet.

There is only beer in the fridge, but no wine. And no cheese to go with my whine.


*DISCLAIMER: This may be a menstrually induced post. I have PMS, and I am not afraid to use it....

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