Thursday, 26 January 2012

So so tired...

My god I'm tired.

Why can't I stay awake past 1pm?

Why do my eyes feel so sore, like they are permanently bruised?

Why is one load of washing and making the kids breakfast enough to reduce me to an exhausted, weeping mess?

If I force myself to do some housework or go to the shops I am in danger of falling asleep where I stand.

If I sit in front of this computer for more than five minutes my head keeps dropping on the keys.

I know we've had a long few months. I've been solo parenting, working, keeping house, running around after an ungrateful and demanding family, organising a move that changed every five minutes.

I know everything's changed and we're in a new place, with new faces, a new house, a new life to get used to.

But I would like some energy now. I would like to be able to play with my kids, or get to the bottom of the washing basket... or simply get through the day without falling asleep on my lounge room floor all afternoon.

I don't know whether starting work will be the cure or the killing stroke. If I'm tired now how will I work eight hours and not become a blubbering mess?

If I'm not sleeping I'm eating... which doesn't do much for the old self esteem, or the attempt to get anything to fit my thighs.

But most of the time I couldn't care because all I want is a giant bucket of m&m's and a pillow please.

1 comment:

  1. I think all your stress is catching up with you. Been there, done that. Maybe working will perk you right up. Once you get there, all the new challenges occupy your thoughts and soon it's time to go home.


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