FFS Friday

Oh what a week it's been.

I'm letting it all out with the delightful Dear Baby G today, and moving on to the weekend.

 What's been giving me the shits this week?


I made a flying trip down to Hicksville on Easter hoping for at least a little relaxation and recuperation... instead I got baby wrangling duty on top of the toddler and tween wars. FFS.

 Mum has never willingly looked after or helped out with my children, despite telling me she will give me any help and support needed, and if she does relent it's with the full force of her passive aggressive "This is SO inconvenient" attitude. But from the minute I walked in the door I became babysitter.
FFS.

Dad disappeared for the majority of Saturday while mum was at work so I cleaned the house, fed and watched the three kids and did all everyone's errands. And got the stink eye because I was buggered and didn't feel like helping with the dishes after dinner.
FFS.

Not ONCE did anyone say thank you after I put the baby to sleep, made a bottle in the middle of the night, took her for walks.
FFS.


 I lost my engagement ring.
FFS.

I don't think mum has taken it seriously because I spoke to her yesterday and asked if she had found it.... she murmured vaguely that it might turn up if I was patient.
FFS.

It's not going to fucking "turn up" if she doesn't pull her finger out and actually bother to look for my most precious fucking possession. 
FFS.

I had to endure hours with The Bitch while she pushed my child out of the way and snatched toys off her to give to the baby, and I'm not allowed to protest or I'm being "petty". 
FFS.

When I got home I gratefully handed over Frog to WonderMan to deal with for a little while and after having to intervene because he was being an impatient prick, he hit me with "You just don't get it do you?" 
FFS.

That was so close to a deal breaker I was ready to get in the car and drive back to hell.
FFS. 

Frog chose Thursday as catch up on sleep day. Too bad I had to be at work at 8:30am and had to drop her off at daycare in her pyjamas.
FFS.

When I picked her up we got half way to the car and she started a full scale meltdown because.... I have no idea why. It went on until 6:10pm when in absolute desperation I started her bath, story, bed routine while she was still screaming.
FFS.

She calmed down and went to sleep peacefully but got up at 9:50pm and played in the lounge room until 1am.
FFS.    

There's more, so much more, but it's time to let it go.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today I will at a funeral to celebrate the life of a woman I loved dearly.


My heart feels broken and I need time to heal it.


I will be spending the weekend at the beach, shouting at the universe and letting the salt and sand do their work on my frail spirit.


Thank you for all your kind and lovely messages yesterday, you have kept me going when all I wanted to do was curl up and hide.

I will see you again next week, hopefully renewed and happier xx